"Yeah, y'know, you keep laughing like that, y'know, the odds become slimmer that I'll take you home and have sex with you." -Norm

"You were born a loser, you're gonna die a loser!" -Danny
"What are you talking about? You're a bald little stub!" -Norm
"I was just trying to inspire you." -Danny
"Oh, I was trying to hurt your feelings." -Norm

"Go brush your teeth." -the Panther
"What? Why?" -Norm
"'Cause I'm gonna need CPR." -the Panther

"Show me a crab!" -Danny

Written by Frank Sebastiano, Directed by Sam Simon

Guest starring Michael McShane as Coach Logan (the Panther). Co-starring Peter Savard as Coach McRhane, Janelle Paradee as Young Woman, Lindsay Taylor as Little Girl.