Quotes from Norm vs. the Wedding

Norm: "Look, Weiner Dog, I'm sorry I had to throw you out of the bedroom last night but your barking was driving Jenny crazy. Just because your people invented that position gives you no right to criticize."

Mrs. Ford about Norm: "I'd hit him on the head but it'd only make him smarter."

Artie: "You shouldn't marry any woman you haven't seen through two menstrual cycles."

Norm: "I love Jenny, but, again, as an American, I love my freedom as well."

Landlady to Danny: "You're a good-lookin' boy. You wanna dance with the devil?"

Jenny: "Money can't buy me happiness."
Mrs. Ford: "That's true, dear, but happiness can't buy you crap."

Norm: "Ah, Mrs. Ford, I see you've never looked lovelier and by lovelier I mean unarmed."

Norm: "She drugged me on Valium."
Laurie: "That's horrible!"
Norm: "Not really."

Norm: "I'm trying to say, Jenny, that I want to marry you, but I want to wait a healthy period of time until your mother dies."

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